Today I was talking to a friend of mine and towards the end of the conversation she mentioned about not expecting so and so to do what she/he did. I had to end the conversation as I had some work to do. But the ending of the conversation made me think: Should we actually have expectations on people?

I believe we all have set some sort of expectations on people; may it be our love ones, our friends, siblings, family, and etc etc etc. How often have we said this: Oh, I did not EXPECT this from her/him? Why do we have to expect anything from people? Why do we tend to EXPECT people to be the way we "think" they are? At the end of day when they do the opposite from what we expect, we get all angry, frustrated, sad."Why can't we just leave people as what they are and not expect people to be as what we want them to be?"

I have read this a nice quote from someone's blog/website a while ago. Memory is not serving me well so I cannot give credit to the owner of the quote.

The quote went on like this: Love all, trust a few... but expectations keep from none.

Guruji Says:

In Salok Mahala 9 (Pannaa 1429)

ਚਿੰਤਾ ਤਾ ਕੀ ਕੀਜੀਐ ਜੋ ਅਨਹੋਨੀ ਹੋਇ ॥
chi(n)thaa thaa kee keejeeai jo anehonee hoe
People become anxious, when something unexpected happens.

ਇਹੁ ਮਾਰਗੁ ਸੰਸਾਰ ਕੋ ਨਾਨਕ ਥਿਰੁ ਨਹੀ ਕੋਇ ॥੫੧॥
eihu maarag sa(n)saar ko naanak thhir nehee koe 51
This is the way of the world, O Nanak; nothing is stable or permanent. 51


In Raag Bilaaval Mahala 4 (Pannaa 800)

ਅਨਿਕ ਉਪਾਵ ਚਿਤਵੀਅਹਿ ਬਹੁਤੇਰੇ ਸਾ ਹੋਵੈ ਜਿ ਬਾਤ ਹੋਵੈਨੀ ॥
anik oupaav chithaveeahi bahuthaerae saa hovai j baath hovainee
People think of many and various efforts, but that alone happens, which is to happen.

ਅਪਨਾ ਭਲਾ ਸਭੁ ਕੋਈ ਬਾਛੈ ਸੋ ਕਰੇ ਜਿ ਮੇਰੈ ਚਿਤਿ ਨ ਚਿਤੈਨੀ ॥੨॥
apanaa bhalaa sabh koee baashhai so karae j maerai chith n chithainee 2
All beings seek goodness for themselves, but what the Lord does - that may not be what we think and expect. 2

Everything happens for a reason which we mere mortal might not understand. To avoid any kind of dissapointment when things/people does not turn out to our expectations, always try to recognize god's doing in all that happen. The least we expect, the least we will get dissapointed on things/people...

Labels: Expectations, guruji